Rock Band: Tantei Edition
by ziraulo
Summary: What if there wasn't a 19th Century London stage in Cocoon? What if it was replaced by...this? Poor, poor Conan-kun...


This was a result of watching Phantom of Baker Street then watching Haruhi's concert. Then the plot bunnies were like "Change the stage, woman! Change it!"

Disclaimer: I'm a girl, so I can't be Gosho Aoyama. And therefore, I don't own DC.

Warning: The endings are OOC. That's all. :D

* * *

"-And the last stage, a concert stadium! Play the right notes to survive this stage. You can also use items on your enemies to distract your them or cause events to prevent them from playing." Noah's Ark finished.

The children began to whisper nervously among themselves. What would happen to them if they don't win? Will they really die? Or is it just some term for "game over"? Suddenly, one voice got their attention. "I want to go home!" cried a little girl in a cotton candy pink dress. Soon, other children began to cry. "Why are you crying? You shouldn't give up without doing your best!" Ran said. The crying ceased immediately after hearing those words, and soon, all the children's attention were directed to the karateka.

Conan smiled. Ran's words eased him as well as he watched her encourage the other kids to do their best so they can get out of the game alive. 'If they knew they really are gonna die if all of us lose, I bet there's going to be more panic...' He thought. Soon after Ran finished her pep talk, the kids began to gather around in groups near the portals to the game's different stage. He felt a tap on his shoulder. "Haibara? What is it?" He asked, startled by Haibara Ai's approach. "Edogawa-kun, you are wanted in the meeting room." She smirked.

The little detective groaned inwardly, remembering the situation. Fate must have some hidden hatred for him; why, just now, it decided to release its crap on him by not having any stage in the game suited for his profession. Sure, he knew how to drive, but unlike his mother, he actually follows the speed limits and safety signs. Not to mention that he's gotten quite rusty. An Indiana Jones themed adventure isn't his thing either, and that goes same for Colosseum battles. And seriously, Vikings? No. Just...no.

'Well I could be in the last stage...after all, I have improved my singing a bit.' He thought proudly as he and Ai made their way to the rest of the Shounen Tantei. 'But then again, I don't think they'll let me near a microphone. I don't think a violin is included in the instruments to be used in the game, either.' He sighed, remembering the preview Noah's Ark gave them. 'I guess it's like that guitar game in the Wii, then?' He thought.

"Conan-kun? Conan-kun!" Ayumi waved her hand in front of his face. "You weren't listening again!" Mitsuhiko said as he snapped out of his trance. Genta, seeing that the other kids have already started entering the portals, decided to let him off the hook. "So? What do you think, Conan? Are you coming with us in the Rock Band stage?" He asked. 'Rock Band?' He paled. "Oi, oi, aren't you supposed to have at least some basic knowledge on how to play a guitar or something before you get in there?" He jerked his thumb to the direction of the portal.

"It is our best chance for survival, though." Ai said. Conan sighed. 'What choice do I have? Well, at least if I get eliminated early, they still have a chance of pulling all of us out of this...' He thought. "Fine..." He grumbled. The Shounen Tantei let out a cheer. At least they were all in this together. Soon after that, they began marching toward the portal. Ran held her hand out to him. He smiled shyly and reached out to her hand. 'Second thought, this isn't such a bad idea...' He blushed.

"Oi, Conan! You better not hold us back or I won't share my unaju with you anymore!"

"Yeah, yeah..."

* * *

The group soon found themselves in the backstage of what seemed to be a concert stadium. 'Judging from back here, we must be performing in some baseball stadium turned concert stadium...' thought Conan. 'That, or maybe we'll be performing in some university.' He rolled his eyes. After all, it is just their first gig, how many people would be out there to watch, anyway?

The backstage manager poked his head from the curtains. "You're up. Good luck, there's a tough crowd out there." He said, passing them by and not even bothering to look at them. "Hey look, those must be our instruments!" Ayumi pointed to a rack in the dark corner of the area. Everyone walked over to it, filled with excitement. Well, except Conan, who, as we all know, isn't mister musically oriented.

"Let's pick our instruments, then." Ai said, stepping forward and picking up a microphone. It was a little large at first, then it scaled itself to fit the shrunken scientist's hand. However, easy as it was for Ai to pick up her choice of, uh, weapon, her fellow shrinkee was busy analyzing the instruments displayed on the rack. There were two electric guitars, a bass guitar, a drum set, and a microphone displayed on it, each waiting for a member of the group to pick it up. 'Let's see...' Conan gave a brief scan over the instruments. His gaze shifted to the microphone. He reached out to pick it up, but something stopped him halfway through reaching for it.

'No...just, no.' He shook his head and withdrew his hand. 'The drums, maybe? Oh, wait, I wasn't so good on it the last time we went to the arcade...' He sweatdropped. His attention turned to the bass guitar, but before he could do an analysis, Ayumi picked it up. 'The electric guitars, then.' He thought determinately. 'Let's see...a Fender Mustang and a Gibson Les Paul...knowing that there are two guitars here, one of them must be the lead guitar.' He thought. However, before he could start his "musical deduction", Mitsuhiko grabbed the Fender Mustang, leaving him with the Gibson Les Paul.

He gulped. 'Please don't be the lead guitar...' He pleaded, picking it up with obvious hesitation. Conan had trouble lifting it, since he had the body of a seven year old boy, and the guitar was almost his weight. He was caught by surprise, however, when the guitar scaled itself to fit him. 'Ookay...that was...convenient.' He thought, sliding the strap to his shoulder. "Looks like you and that Gibson Les Paul have something in common now." Ai said. "'S if you can talk..." Conan retorted, pointing at her microphone.

"Shounen Tantei-dan to the platform, please!" called out a woman's voice. The group rushed to a raised platform which was directly under the stage and positioned themselves accordingly. Conan scanned the group, partly curious who got which instrument, but mostly to check on who isn't ready yet. 'Let's see, Genta got the drums, Ayumi has the bass guitar, Mitsuhiko has the Fender Mustang, and Haibara and Ran are the vocalists.' He observed. 'Looks like everyone's ready.' He concluded.

Slowly, the platform rose and the ceiling above them opened. 'A big entrance, huh?' He thought, looking at his nervous band mates. 'Thank you, Noah's Ark, for enhancing the kids' stage fright.' He thought sarcastically. Finally, the platform stopped rising, and they felt it steady itself on the floor of the stage. Clouds of fake fog were starting to gather at their feet, and true to Conan's first deduction, they indeed were going to perform in a baseball stadium. Cheering and glow stick waving commenced from their "adoring fans" at the bleachers.

The spotlight was soon directed on them, and they shielded themselves from the intense light. "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MAY I PRESENT WHAT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR TONIGHT..." the announcer paused. 'Oi, oi, don't tell me Kid's in here too?' Conan thought. His question remained unanswered, though, as the announcer continued. "THE SHOUNEN TANTEI-DAN!" the speakers boomed. The crowd cheered even louder.

Conan heard an "Eep!" coming from his left. Turning to the said direction, he was caught by surprise upon seeing that Ran's party dress was replaced by a sexy, form fitting bunny outfit that could put even the Playboy bunny to shame. Heat began rising to his cheeks, which were slowly being tinted red. He turned away immediately, though, shaking off any inappropriate thoughts that crossed his mind. Turning to his right, he saw Mitsuhiko's horrified face as he found that his outfit was replaced by a sailor fuku-styled uniform."What the heck am I wearing?" Conan heard Genta's horrified scream. 'Lemme guess, another sailor fuku victim?' He snickered.

But just when the little detective thought that he was spared from the horrors of instant costume change, a bundle of cloth landed on him, as if it were some gift from the heavens. The clothes scaled themselves to fit a young boy, and soon he found his usual outfit replaced by a wizard costume. 'Hey, at least you're not in a sailor fuku.' A voice in his head reminded him. Then, seeing a very irritated Ai in a bunny outfit, it added, 'Or a bunny outfit.'

Just when they had all adjusted to the intensity of the lights, the huge LCD screen in front of them turned on, and a DDR-esque song selection menu appeared. 'But where are the controls?' Conan thought, looking for something that at least resembled a gaming keypad. 'Oi, oi, don't tell me...' His eyes widened. Sure enough, the highlight was moving on it's own, indicating that Noah's Ark was choosing the song for them. 'Please pick an easy song, please pick and easy song...' He gulped. Unfortunately, that plea did not reach the ears of the master control (well, if it had ears). The highlight moved itself to the "random selection" button, and selected it.

The result?

One completely horrified shrunken detective.

But that's not all. The roulette soon stopped at a particular song. The image shown was that of a young woman wearing a bunny outfit that was similar to Ran's, who looked like she was singing and playing the guitar. And of course, what musically-inclined game wouldn't be complete without a sample of the song?

_...watashi tsuiteiku yo  
donna tsurai sekai no yami no naka de sae  
kitto anata wa kagayaite..._

Now, Conan may be no music expert, but he does know how to recognize a popular song if it was played through the speakers. Just like this one. 'God know by Hirano Aya? Is he serious?' Conan panicked. The panicking was a little too late, though. The game was already loading the song. 'I don't even know how to play a guitar!' His mind practically screamed. Then, he felt something on his fingertips. 'Is it just me, or did the strings just change into buttons?' He thought. He whipped his head around to check. And just as he thought, there really were buttons; and in different colors, too. 'Let's see, red, green, yellow, blue and orange. Five all in all, plus a strum bar.' He counted.

His attention was directed back to the LCD screen. A Guitar Hero-esque gameplay screen was shown and the count down started. 'Oh...so that's what the buttons are for...' He nodded slowly in realization. His "fully adjusted to the game" situation was cut off as soon as he made another realization:

He got the lead freaking guitar.

Only one thing was in his mind:

'Oh, crap.'

* * *

**Ending 1:**

Unbeknownst to our heroes, Noah's Ark hacked into a youtube user's account and was now doing a live webcast of their performance. Said performance was also being watched in the control room. The people in the control room were either:

a) Shocked, since how the heck did a seven year old learn to play a song that hard after stumbling miserably through the intro, first verse and first chorus?

b) Laughing their asses off at the sight of seven year old boys in Suzumiya Haruhi styled sailor fukus, or

c) Commenting on how Ai and Ran's bunny costumes resembled that of the Playboy bunny's.

Suddenly, Kudo Yukiko popped out of nowhere. "Hey, Ran-chan's clothes are strapless! What's keeping them on?" She pointed. Yuusaku looked at the screen. His wife did have a point; no matter how clingy the costume was, it was still bound to fall off with all those movements! But the Kudo patriarch just smiled and shook his head. He tugged at his wife's sleeves and pointed to the glass window. "The collective will of the entire party." He replied solemnly.

Yukiko gasped at the sight that met her. It seemed that all parents temporarily forgot about their kids' situation and were rocking out to the music, complete with glow stick waving. Who knew music had the power to do this?

**

* * *

**

**Ending 2:**

"Hey, that dress is strapless, what's keeping it on?" Kogoro shrieked in a girly voice. All the others gave him weird looks. And to top it off, Yuusaku was like, "What the hell, man?"


End file.
